Monday, November 24, 2008

Slideshow

Yesterday at church a lady asked me about the wedding and if I cried. I told her I didn't, then said "Well, I did get at tear in each eye that just kind of swam around in there for a little bit, never fell out or anything." I told her it was kind of like a slide show. I felt like I had one of those old slide projector buttons in my hand and every once in a while I would click the button to see the next slide. His whole life went through my heart in just a few minutes. Click . . .

I'm in the delivery room with a fresh baby laying on my chest as the nurses are searching for the key to unlock the oxygen tank. He was born not breathing. I had read enough midwife books to know I needed to rub him pretty vigorously to get him going and was really glad I read those books. I rubbed and prayed for his life. He gasped in a big gulp of air and started crying. So did his momma. That was the sweetest sound I'd ever heard. Click . . .

Adam is two and a half years old laying in the livingroom floor in a body cast playing with his G.I. Joes. He had broken his leg and they had to put him in the body cast to mobilize his hips so his break would heal. He would just lay in the floor playing and when he started getting tired he would ask me to bring his baby over there. Kayla was 2 weeks old. I would lay her by him and they would nap together. They still like each other pretty much! Click . . .

Adam is about 4 or 5 and we are at Memaw's for Christmas. All three kids are looking through the tree to see if they can find their "Baby's First Christmas" ornament she alway put on the tree. Kyle and Kayla found theirs but Adam wasn't having any luck. He looked up at me with the saddest little face and said "I missed my first Christmas." You see, his birthday is December 29th - four days after Christmas. Click . . .

Adam comes in from jumping on the trampoline. His cheek had just hit Robbie Huestis right on the knee! When the swelling went down he had a dimple where the impact had occured. It matched the one he was born with on the other cheek, just a little higher. He had asked me once before why he had a dent in his face. I told him God had given it to him. Now he had one from Robby too. We affectionately started calling calling him Dentface. Click . . .

I'm sitting in a rocking chair in my bedroom rocking, praying, crying. Adam was about 13 and we had just come back from the orthopedic surgeon's office where we went to get results from an MRI done in Lubbock on his leg. He had a big knot on his shin that was giving him a lot of pain. When we walked into the little room waiting on the doctor, I saw his chart laying on the cabinet. I picked it up and looked at the radiologist' report and saw the word CARCINOMA. I know it was probably typed in lower case, but it was huge to me. I honestly felt the blood drain from my face. The doctor walked in and immediately knew what I'd read. She told me she really believed it wasn't cancer, that she was sending all his records to Cook Children's Hospital in Ft. Worth and that we would hear something in the next few days. I went home, went straight to my room and started pleading with God for Adam's life. Two and a half years earlier cancer had taken his daddy, and I just didn't think I was ready to walk that road again. I knew God's faithfulness was real but I had so much fear sitting in that rocking chair that I rocked him in when he was a baby. The next night Michael and I went out to eat for our anniversary and Christy was keeping the twins and got the call from the doctor that there was a 99% chance it was benign. She called the restaurant and told us the news. Michael and I cried the rest of the meal. We were so grateful to God. Click . . .

Adam is laying in ICU hooked up to machines that were breathing for him and monitoring his heart. He looked so lifeless. The cardiologist had just repaired a hole in his heart a little bigger than a silver dollar. He was 16 years old and he had a new scar down his chest that most don't get until they are much older. We were so grateful they found the hole, because the doctor told us that if they handn't found it . . . well, you know. Click . . .

I'm looking in my rear view mirror at the police car behind me. Adam and I had just eaten at Rosa's in Lubbock. He was on duty so I met him for supper. As we left and pulled out to a stop sign, I glanced up to see him behind me. I took a picture and sent it to Kayla and told her this is what it would look like if she ever got stopped by him. Click . . .

Last Thanksgiving I was standing at the stove cooking and Adam was helping. He started telling me about this amazing girl he had met. Told me all about her heart and her love for Jesus. They had emailed and texted, but hadn't talked on the phone. He was a little gun shy of pursuing anyone because he didn't want to get the wrong one. So he took it pretty slow. I started praying for Amber and for Adam to hear from the Lord. At Christmas he asked if I was still praying for her. I told him I was and he said he was thinking about taking her to eat. A month or so later I went to Lubbock and he asked if Amber could go with us to eat. As I sat across from them I knew I was sitting with Adam and his bride. Click . . .

As Adam watches his bride come to him dressed in her beautiful gown, he has a little half smile. When she gets there and her emotional daddy passes her off, Adam holds on to her with both hands. He can't take his eyes off of her. Click.

I love you Dentface.