A Room Full of Wanted

Last March I was blessed to spend a weekend with several Red Raider girls in the mountains of New Mexico. The time was completely sweet. There was something Marla said, though, that has stuck with me these last several months. She told of how sometimes she wakes up in the mornings to be mommy to her three little ones not feeling so joyful, or beautiful, or worthy. She went on to say how she would sing God's truths over herself because His truth was truth, whether she felt it or not.

That has stuck with me.

Last Thursday night, after a very busy, very trying week, I climbed into our big recliner and called the thirteen girls at our house in for a time of quiet before they began drinking their sodas and Red Bulls in order to stay up all night.

Honestly, I was so physically and emotionally exhausted from the first three days of the week, that I almost called the "girls' night" off. Oh, thank You God, that my selfishness didn't win out this time.

I asked the girls to share some things they believed about themselves.

"I'm ugly."

"I'm not worthy of friends who care."

On and on they went, spewing out these things that were lies from the enemy.

Then I had them speak Truth about themselves. It was difficult for them.

One precious girl, in a wad laying at the side of my chair began to weep. I knew what was going on in her life and reached over and held on to her leg and said, "You are wanted!"

Wanted.

By the Most High.

He doesn't ignore our calling out to Him. As a matter of fact, Psalm 116:2 says that He inclines His ear to hear us. He bends over to catch every whisper directed His way.

Be still my heart.

I looked around at the beauty in that room. The hearts that wanted to be wanted. To be chosen.

Help them get it Lord. Help them understand that only You can fill that God-sized hole that is yearning to be loved. To be beautiful and to be chosen. To be wanted.

Only You.

Time Spent

One of the greatest treats for me as a Momma is to see my kids ministering to other people. When Kayla talks about the Bible study she has in her home with several of the girls who were part of our Bible study in Stillwater, I usually cry. It makes my heart happy. Jade is loving on other mommy's babies and Amber has prayed over the radio with one who was waiting for help to come. Kevin spends valuable time with a young man going to school in Tulsa. Both Kyle and Adam have talked to people about the Lord, sometimes while their audience is captive. :)

When I talk with Keith and Sherri about the university ministry at Lubbock, I am overwhelmed with how God is using them. When I was at their house last Thursday night we stayed up until well after one just talking God talk. So sweet.

Marla shares some of when she and Justin lead worship and, the greatest of all - when she loves on her babies.

There is nothing I want more than for my kids to be in the center of God's will. Watching them work for the Lord, hearing how they love on students/young ladies/babies just makes me feel like I'm going to explode.

This past weekend in Ruidoso I was so blessed to spend time with Sherri, Marla, Tara and Cynthia as we loved on those girls. There is nothing sweeter than working alongside girls you've been blessed to spend time with earlier in life. Knowing that time put into their lives is now bearing fruit.

Love every minute now.

Worth every minute then.

Sherri, Cynthia and Tara

Sweet Girls

Twins - not really

Baby Anna

Free To Sing

I couldn’t stand there any longer. Not one second more. My body slid down the door frame to my knees. Hearing the hearts singing out in worship to their Bridegroom, their Lover, their Jesus, forced me to my knees.

I soaked it in. It was beautiful to me.

It had to be glorious to Him.

For months I had prayed that He would meet with us there. There on that mountain. My prayer was that He would show us Himself so mighty that we couldn’t credit any one else.

I pictured Him getting to the cabin before us, walking through to make sure everything was ready.

We had some things to give Him. Some names that didn’t belong to us but we carried because we believed the deceiver. We gave Him Unworthy. We gave Him Immoral and Unforgiven. We gave Him Forsaken and Unclean.

Then.

Then He gave us something in return. He called us Worthy. He called us Forgiven and, I love this, My Delight Is In Her. He called us Daughter. And, hold on . . . He called us Bride.

That is why we could sing. These girls who wore black and red and who could have possibly thrown a tortilla or two in their college lives.

We sang because we believed Him. Oh, we already believed in Him, but now we believed Him.

Our voices singing out Jesus Loves Me. Our hearts crying out Lord I’m Amazed By You.

We took it in. We took Him in.

There in the back of the room on my knees I listened to hearts. Hearts singing out strong because an exchange had been made.

An exchange that made us free to sing.

He Speaks, and the Sound of His Voice

There are times you hear from God and it’s as if He is sitting beside you whispering His will right into your ear. His Creator voice into your created ear. Some claim to have heard an audible voice from their God. I haven’t had that experience, but I might as well have. There have been many times I knew an answer was straight from Him.

The last time that happened was a week ago Saturday. For several months I have been preparing to speak to a group of ladies from Kingsland Baptist Church in Katy. The theme for their retreat was based on the different relationships women experience. I bought several books and read through the one they were suggesting. I had notes everywhere and books everywhere, but nothing was coming together in my head.

So that Saturday I was at the church all day trying to help Michael by keeping visitors out of his office so he could study, and had all my notes all over the desk trying to come up with something. Still nothing.

That night as I was heading south toward the house, I cried out to God, asking why things weren’t happening for me. After all, I only had six days left. Then I clearly heard in my head, “I didn’t make you a speaker. You go do what you do.” Then a sweet peace just came over me. I woke up the next morning, still without a plan, but a confidence that He did have a plan.

That next weekend in beautiful Camp Tejas, God met with me and 100+ other women eager to hear from Him. He was amazing. Ely also heard from Him and the songs she brought to sing with us went hand in hand with the spoken Word. I wish you could have seen their faces as the Word washed over them. A beautiful sight. I was so blessed to be able to witness that.

What if I hadn’t heard from Him? What if He spoke and I didn’t hear because of the desire to have a plan to please or meet others’ expectations? I hate knowing that I’ve probably missed Him many times. I don’t ever want to miss Him again.

There is a song that has played itself over and over again in my head the last week or so. One part of it goes like this:

He speaks, and the sound of His voice

is so sweet the birds hush their singing.

And the melody that He gave to me

within my heart is ringing.

Thank you, Jesus for putting the melody in my heart. It comes from You and only You. Thank You for loving me enough to tell me what You need me to know. Thank You that I heard You Saturday night.

Take the glory, Lord, take the glory.